Questioning stimulants

I'm having somewhat of an identity crisis. I'm questioning whether it's right to take ADHD medication or not. I take antidepressants, which I have come to terms with that I need. When it comes to my ADHD however it's not a mental health condition, and I feel like I shouldn't have to medicate it away. It's like I'm supressing my personality. I do take vyvanse right now though. The source of me questioning this is the neurodiversity movement among autism, that is also beginning to encompass ADHD more as well. What are your thoughts about this? To be clear: I'm not questioning the effectiveness of stimulants, or people's personal choices as a whole. If it works for you and you are not concerned with the philosophical/existential part: good for you!

chalussy

If you feel like you are suppressing your personality, you may have the wrong dosage. Might be too high. Or there may be the chance it’s too low depending on what you mean by that. You don’t have to take medication, a lot of people choose not to for many reasons. For me, I didn’t know I even had adhd until recently and every single problem I had when it came to adulting, being places on time, getting myself to actually do the most basic things I couldn’t ever push myself to, etc- meds have helped me with. I’m not 100% without those things, but I, for once in my life, am experiencing that successes in these areas ARE POSSIBLE. They weren’t before no matter what life hack or tip I tried before. Meds and the diagnosis changed my life and washed away 80% of my depression and anxiety. I am still me, I’m just less depressed. I’m still bubbly, passionate, caring, funny, creative, intelligent, etc. I’m still me. But, while finding the right dosage and medication- I felt like I wasn’t me at all. Just a consideration. Meds are wonderful for some, not all people want them or need them, but to feel like your personality is being hidden makes me think your dosage is wrong. :/ But that’s for you and ur doc to decide. And if you choose to do no meds, I wish you the best of luck and good vibes and that you find successes and experience the freedom and happiness you seek. <3

ohmu.

Thanks for your reply!! I think I am on a good dosage. Not too high, and I've tried other medications before which didn't work. It's not so much a real perceived suppression of my personality, but the fact that I know that I'm changing the way my brain works. Even if it is helping by making my executive functioning more like that of a neurotypical person, I think the issue is, at its roots, society, that forces us to need medication in the first place. I'm not against medicine per se, and I'm fine with medicating my depression and anxiety, because those are mental health issues, while my ADHD and autistic traits aren't. That said, I'm in a position in my life where I'm not willing to quit taking stimulants, and I will keep taking them for the foreseeable future.

zsofia

Hey, I really appreciate you sharing this – I deeply resonate with what you’re saying. I’ve been through similar thoughts myself. I truly believe that people with ADHD or autism – or anyone on the neurodivergent spectrum – are not “wrong” or “broken.” We don’t need to be fixed or molded to fit into neurotypical standards. We just function differently – in how we think, feel, and especially in how we handle things like stress, structure, and productivity. Our personalities are not a problem – they are just different. That said, the world we live in often isn’t built for the way we function. Most jobs still follow rigid 9-to-5 schedules, which can feel incredibly overwhelming for many of us. Flexible or adaptive work environments are still rare – at least from what I’ve seen. In a world that truly accommodated neurodivergence – one that allowed us to build our lives and routines around how we work best – I honestly believe many of us wouldn’t need medication. But we don’t live in that world (yet). So for now, medication can be an incredibly helpful tool – not to suppress who we are, but to help us survive and function in systems that weren’t made with us in mind. To me, ADHD medication isn’t about changing your personality – it’s about supporting your brain in navigating a world that often demands things from you that your natural rhythm struggles with. It’s okay to use tools that help you feel less overwhelmed and more able to engage with life without burning out. In an ideal world, we wouldn’t need them. But in this world, it’s okay to give yourself permission to use what helps – without guilt. Whatever you choose, I wish you clarity and self-kindness in the process. You’re not alone in this.

theadhdmom

Completely agree. And I also need to say that medication is a tool to be used when there's real loss in functioning and suffering. That can be from our society structure, yes. But it also could...not...some problems would exist in new ways. That being said: for me medication allowed me to know an aspect of myself that I have never known before. I know I'm an intelligent person, but didn't really feel like it. Under medication I actually felt that, cause I didnt made silly mistakes from my lack of focus. If anything, antidepressants make me feel a little like that, because I feel some anedomnia (?), like no steong emotions. I cant cry anymore and I use to cry A LOT. It bothers me sometimes, bacause I was more sensitive and enotional. But now I also know a side of myself that's actually practical, assertive and clear minded. I've learnt that my huge sensitiveness came from too much anxiety and being to tense and emotionaly hyperactive all the time. I'm now usually more focused, more rational and way more assertive. I don't think medication changed my personality...maybe my personality (or the idea I had of myself) was built in a lot of suffering that felt normal, cause I didn't know any other way of being. After medications (and lots of therapy), I believe that now I can actually get to know other aspects of myself. Things I can do and be, besides what I've always been. Nothing can really change who we are (except maybe brain injury), but we evolve and change all the time, with every single experience. I think of meds like just one of those experiences... Just for thought: sometimes we change all of our interests, looks ans stuff for a partner, or a job or after a dificult life experience and that's usually considered OK. Do as you feel comfortable, of course, but maybe you can think of meds like what they are: just a tool. It won't define you, but it may contribute to your life.

sunflowermuffin

Very well said! Thank you for sharing!

ohmu.

Very insightful, thank you! And I agree with your reasoning.

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