How do I take on new hobbies?

There's a lot of stuff that I wanna learn how to do. Skating, working out, speaking Spanish, etc. But, I don't really have a plan in mind to do those things. Not to mention the voice in the back of my head telling me "those require you to adhere to a routine, and you're not good at that". I know I should just ignore that voice, but it's a lot easier said than done. Because that was the message I got from my mom before she died; that I'm too dumb and too broken to actually become the person I want to be. I don't know what advice you could give me here, but I'm just glad I got this off my chest.

Posts and comments here share personal experience — not medical advice. For treatment questions, talk to a clinician.

TryEachDay

4mo

Maybe ask an AI to create a worksheet for you. I wanted to learn more about financial stability and money saving. I let ChatGPT create a workplan over 8 weeks. It was get information through Youtube, books, podcasts and so on. Each week I could chose a time to work on the small goals and cross off the tasks. Now I have a plan how to get some savings for the future. So start with small tasks and plan over a few weeks. So you balance those times where you can't learn new things but need to make sure to care for yourself

Auggie🏳️‍⚧️

4mo

Where can I start? I love to do activities a lot, it’s just my brain sometimes. It can be annoying, but I still do all my activities and crafts! Here are some I do that are good for having ADHD: -nature…just find a spot in nature or outside that is calming to you and use that space often. -crafts…this is a big one for me! I love crafts, I’ve done more harder crafts, but I suggest easier ones. Like painting, drawing is a good one, or even writing! I think writing/journaling is a good coping skill too! These are some ideas

martin777

4mo

First of all, I’m sorry you’ve constantly got such a negative message. This is more of a reflection of the sender, than it is of you. With ADHD you’re neither dumb nor broken. You just have a different operating system, that you need to learn to use. If you buy a Mac and try to use the same commands everyone else is using on Windows, it won’t work, if you use it the way it’s intended, it will work even better 🍀 With the things you "want” to do, try to listen deeply, if this is really your want or someone else’s should. If it is truly your want, just start a routine with this app and start slowly. For learning Spanish, try DuoLingo. It’s a small step every day, that’s fun - and over time you’ll get better and better. Find a time of day that works for you, where you can do this every day (or x days a week for working out) Set a routine here on this app and keep checking it off. It is oddly satisfying to see a streak grow. Just don’t beat yourself up if you mess up your streak - it happens… just start over and keep going. You’ve got this! 🔥🔥🔥 And always remember: you’re awesome and powerful - never let anyone tell you otherwise 🍀

emmB@

4mo

Oh ! È una stupenda lingua, vero ?

martin777

4mo

Sto imparando anche l'italiano con Duolingo. 😁🍀

emmB@

4mo

I agree a 100% with everything martin777 wrote ! I feel for you, but hope you will find some things that will make you feel better. Adhering to a routine is hard, but if some things motivate you enough, you could manage it (after some time) ! My first pièce of advice would be to go easy on you when you stop doing regularly some activity or other : I have kind of accepted that my interests are on a rotation. I have a (mostly fixed) number of things I like to do, but when my schedule changes a bit, or fatigue and anxiety take too much of my energy, I know I will have to focus on « just » staying afloat ; and then, I know I will abandon my current interest to focus on daily life, then get better, and be able to start a new routine with another activity, and so on. But I know I always come back to my « core »activities - each on their own time ! My prefered activities are : - learning Italian on Duolingo - learning chess with the Chess app - drawing - watercolor - reading +++ - jigsaw puzzles 🧩 (I’m not sure I have the name right, but emojis are very handy so you see what I mean 😅) What helps me stick with activities : - the streak, like martin777 said ! So apps are very useful if you can afford them… - doing things with people : I have a book club, and even though it doesn’t guarantee I will read the book, it helps me stay committed to the activity, and it gives me a great safe space with like-minded people. To be able to « start », maybe you should also listen to what you FEEL LIKE doing the most right now, and not what you SHOULD do right now : if you feel like exploring Spanish on Duolingo instead of working out, eventhough you haven’t been doing your work out for 3 days in a row, well I say go for Spanish ! It will all work itself out in the end : but because of task avoidance, you’ll probably be better off if you stop tormenting yourself with « shoulds » and « musts »… Good luck with your hobbies !

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