I need help 🥺

@Camilita first off, I am so sorry for your loss. Maybe we can support each other. I have 4-year old son and my husband passed away when he was 2. Besides my ADHD, I have a book of other mental health issues. I also think my son may have ADHD but might be too young to be diagnosed 🤷🏻‍♀️ so I feel this message so much. I have been so depressed this last week and it doesn’t seem to be getting better. I’ve had to say to my son, “Sorry Mommy is so sad.” like a billion times. He always tells me it’s ok. Do what you can and screw the rest for now. No matter how bad our situations are and how we think we might not be mothering like we should, our kiddos don’t see things that way. Kids are smarter than we think when it comes to us being an emotional mess. I currently have so many tasks that need to get done and guess what, they’re not done at all. Rest and get your sweet girl to rest with you. Maybe you could watch a movie together or read some books together. When you do get up, grab a water bottle and fill it up and grab a few snacks. That way when you do go lay down or sit and you can’t move, at least you’ll have a little something. Losing people that are important in your and your child’s life, can and will take a huge tole on you. Here it is 2 years later and I still feel like this. It won’t always be that way, so don’t forget that. I do know about all the paperwork you have to take on after a loss. I’m so thankful that I did have someone here to help. I really wish I could be there with you to help with the hard stuff. I know this is super long and now that I’m overthinking it, I hope that it’s ok. I just wanted to help you any way I could. Here if you want to talk 🥲

Hey @Camilita. I know your this post is from back to the beginning of July…How are you doing? I can completely relate to experiencing major depression.😣 Kudos to you for reaching out! Is there anything I/we can do for you now? Are you still wanting “double buddies”?

@Camilita, I’m not sure where you live. If it’s in Europe is that any way you could ask for a sick leave at the doctors? That’s probably the first step to get a break and be able to rest before tackling some of the tasks ahead?

You can do this! It's already a big step, to ask for help, you're doing great! I don't know in which country you are right now, but it's worth checking if there is any social workers office around, so that they can provide a good amount of help, do the paper for you, ask for someone to come and help you at your place for the task you don't have the energy for right now. Also, if there are any charity organisations around, as they can provide with the here and now help that you need and that none of us can provide you with

Hey Camilita, I’m really sorry for what you’re going through. Losing your husband and having no room to grieve, because you have to be there for your daughter is hard. I’m basically at a loss for words which very rarely happens to me, but I know you will make it - for your daughter, for you and for your late husband, who I’m sure doesn’t want you to suffer like that. In our darkest hours it’s hard to see the light, but even if we can’t see it in the moment, it is always still there. You are strong and the fact that you share your story with all of us here, shows me that you are and that you will make it through these difficult times. I believe in you! You can do it and little by little step you will get better. Don’t beat yourself up for what you didn’t do, show yourself the love you show others and deserve yourself and give yourself grace. You are enough, you do your best and that is all anyone could ever expect. You are brave. You will get through this! 🍀❤️🍀

You’ll get through this. Might not feel like it now. But you will!!

Camilita, just writing in a new reply so that you get a Numo notification 💬 I’ve edited the original post and added a normal link there beside the QR image. Good luck again 🍀 Edit: if there’s any hassle, you can reply to this comment instead of the other one since Numo has issues with longer threads 🧵

Haha, no problem 😀 Here’s the link in text form: https://tinyurl.com/yck2sw3n (Numo did not support clicking on links 🔗 in the past, so that’s why I sent it in QR form…)

🩵🙏 In my head I was supposed to answer some of you already days ago, but the overwhelm was too overwhelming… I’m trying really hard here, as I hate asking for help. I believe I’ve struggled with RSD since childhood and so I have always been a bit reserved… and always felt like it would be wrong for me to take up space…. So this is new to me. But I am touching rock bottom, so I am willing to try new ways and I’m grateful for all of you. Thank you for cheering for me and giving me positive reactions for reaching out. Thank you for giving me sympathy and empathy. Thank you for lowering the bar for me. Thank you for the small things like sending me your thoughts. It all means so much to me 🥹🩵

My most sincere appreciation for all the support 💛🙏 I am so tired and it is really hard to keep up with everything…… But I am considering doing dishes now… which is one of my biggest sensory icks… if you want to keep me accountable, you can like this comment or comment on it and I will get the signal that you are excepting me to come back with a result.

Sending all the love 🫶🏼🤍

Dear Camalita Well, I'm with all the other answerers (is that even a word?)! So sorry for your loss! Depression sucks big time. I'm absolutely amazed that you found the courage and strength to reach out here 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 As I have no clue to were you're located, all the help I can offer are thoughts, sympathy, best wishes and whatever I can send you via text 🤗 Also, I hope you have the support of doctors/therapist, too. All the Best to you and your daughter

I just want you to know that you are 100% valid for feeling the way you do. Dealing with grief can be a long process but I promise with time I know you WILL overcome this obstacle. I can only imagine what you and your daughter must be going through is truly tragic. 💔 BUT kudos to you for reaching out for help!! taking the first step is the hardest and you’ve already done that!! Congratulations!!! I know it won’t be easy, so my advice is don’t overwhelm yourself with thinking about all things that need to be done. try and take it one minute at a time. Dont want to wash dishes, just wash 1 bowl. Don’t want to brush your teeth, Just splash water on your face. Remember anything is better than nothing and is a step towards healing. Try taking very small steps to improve self care, that way you can take care of YOU, so you can be stronger for your daughter, which you are already in the process of doing. ❤️‍🩹 As a little girl who grew up with a mom who had depression, ocd, and extremely high functioning autism, I ended up being a latchkey child, raising myself, because with the depression she would sleep allllll the time, and then stay up all night obsessively cleaning the kitchen and zoning out watching her tv shows. I never understood why she was depressed, I wish she would have talked to me about that, instead of the adult issues like paying bills that kids shouldn’t have to worry about. Maybe I would have learned how to deal with my own emotions if she led by example. Now as a 34 yr old adult I also struggle with adhd and executive dysfunction and would definitely like to be apart of a group that we can all hold each other accountable and motivate each other! I want to help you and your daughter in anyway I can!! Please don’t hesitate to reach out, My name is Roxy and I’m from Texas! 12107876081 text or WhatsApp

And dont stress to answer all comments ♥️😉 we see you🤗🫶🏽

Dear camilita🥺 I don't have the right words right now but I want you to know that I can relate to what you are going through and how hard it is to still try to fulfill your responsibilities in life every day ♥️ I know what it is like to feel the pain of a loved one and at the same time be drowned by your own pain 😣 and even when it doesn't really change your situation from distance…remember you are not alone with your feelings and you dont need to be strong by yourself 💞🫶🏽…… & even if you want to take away your daughters pain or try to make it easier you can't take away her pain as well as you can take away your pain..... but, and yes some people find it annoying, but I like the sayings: if you go through hell don't stop walking! We will get through this! Your daughter and you will get through this difficult journey, though it may feel like you are drowning right now! I believe in you and your strength to get through this camilita💪🏽 ->👑✨❣️ don’t give up, step by step, day by day🫶🏽

Camilita, sorry for your loss… it’s hard 🥹 and a small child … And a foreign country…. Where in the world do you live and are you from… Maybe someone lives nearby or speaks you language. This is a big community you never know. 🥰 I’ll wish you luck and happiness in this dark moments. Ps I’ll understand such things brushing teeth is a mountain to climb and just starting the day is more than running a marathon for us 🤗

I would like to help you in general but may be too inconsistent in practice. I am currently trying to get myself into the mindset of being more consistent with my online voluntary work and definitely need to finally take a shower before my friend's graduation on Friday. Perhaps we could work on building a few positive things to do to facilitate the basics. Please do contact me.

Praying for you and your daughter. Be gentle with yourself. You are both grieving. Acknowledge and name your grief for your sake and your daughter’s sake. Fix a favorite meal with her as your body double (in the room together) or order take out. As much as you don’t want to eat, your brain needs the protein to function. Protein helps depression meds work. Without the protein, the meds can’t take effect. (Dealt with major depression for years, and adhd-and still do.) Please breathe, and drink a glass of water. My heart breaks for you both!

My heart is with you! Please remember, no matter how clean your dishes - you are still a beautiful creative soul!

My heart is with you and your daughter right now 💖 sending so much love from Australia 💖 I hope you two can turn to each other when your hurting and comfort each other 💖💖

Greetings from Germany, I d live to support you. I feel you. Is a very tough situation u r in right now.

Thank you all for answering 💛💛💛 Today has been overwhelming, but I will answer each and everyone of you tomorrow 🙏

With you in spirit. Bravo for reaching out!

Hi Camilita. I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I have my children half time and struggle to Manage, I can't imagine how difficult it would be to have them full time! I would love to help in any way possible. Maybe Similar to what A.D suggested. If you need more body doubling apart from Numo and A.D. i would love to help and I would also benfit from it. Also I noticed that some of your to dos were in Swedish are you currently living in Sweden? I live in Stockholm. I can also meet up physically, in a public place, maybe a cafe.

Hi Camilita, That’s a lot to handle 😔 I can have a 30-minute morning Zoom accountability meeting with you for a week or two – until you’re back on your feet again. If you’re ok with that, the QR code below is a link to a Zoom room. Scan it, open the link, and please write in the chat there a daily morning time slot that is appropriate for you. We’re all on the same boat here, so I promise you that such daily meetings will help a lot 👍 Edit: I’m in Germany (CET time zone.) Edit: here’s the link as a WhatsApp group, which is easier: https://chat.whatsapp.com/Jo6SHoXGfzmC33jpPGTqsI Good luck 🍀